"have we grown tired of God?" by anna blaedel

Exodus 33:12-33
Matthew 22:15-22
October 19, 2008

Last Wednesday, the youth in this community chose to make another trip to Mason City to hear John Bul Dau, one of the almost 30,000 Lost Boys of Sudan, share and speak to the violence, struggle, and hope woven into his life’s story. The week before, we viewed the film "God Grew Tired of Us," featuring John Bul Dau and other Lost Boys. Torn from his home and family by the civil war and atrocity in Sudan, John spoke of his life as a living story, a living testimony. His story, he said, and our stories, are living because they come from others, from humans we will never meet, are brought into our lives and then flow from us to others through our own living stories. His life is shadowed by a depth of inhumanity, and also shines with the power of God and power of people who are doing God’s work of love and justice in the world. Depth of suffering, depth of connection. Both, and, together in complex relationship. In the midst of violence I cannot begin to comprehend, hunger and poverty I can only imagine, John Bul Dau found his faith, his theology pushed to the brink, crying out, “Surely God has grown tired of us!” A tricky question born of deep despair, and because cried out to God in prayer, deep hope. Both, and.

Let us pray: May the words of my mouth, and the meditations of all of our hearts, be acceptable to you, O God our Strength and our Redeemer.

The officers of the temple and officers of the Roman Empire came to Jesus in this morning’s gospel story, and tried to trip him with their own tricky question. A no-win, only-lose question. Either his religious leadership is discredited. Or he is caught advocating breaking the Roman law. “Is it lawful to pay taxes to the emperor, or not?” Either faithful, or lawful. Either, or. Yes, or… (thanks to Rev. Odette Lockwood Stewart for this original insight and idea she preached at Epworth UMC, in Berkeley)

Jesus found, Jesus offered, another way. Yes, and. Both, and. He asked them for a Roman coin they used to pay taxes. He pointed to the emperor’s image on it. And he said, “Give to the emperor the things that are the emperor’s, but then, he added, AND give to God the things that are God’s. Essentially, you decide. Jesus turns the tricky question, the dilemma of ethics and morality and faith back onto the people.

What belongs to empire? What belongs to God?

He invites these tricksters, or hypocrites as he calls them, invites his followers, invites us, to enter into this living story, to reach deep into our moral compass, to remember who we are and remember whose we are. If you recall, not rules, but relationships, guide our life of faith.

Who belongs to empire? Who belongs to God?

This story invites us, each day invites us, to remember that we belong to God. All of us. That all we are and all we have, all we do and all we imagine, belongs to God. Is given by God. To be returned to God.

On our way back from Mason City last Wednesday night, the youth riding with me shared songs from their iPod play lists, music which speaks to them, and the stories of their lives. Now, I admit I had to listen carefully to “scream rock” ??? I believe it’s called genre of the band 10 Years, to hear the message. One of the refrains they especially wanted me to hear, especially wanted to share, is a message I needed to hear. These are the lyrics of the refrain: “Brace yourselves and give into the moment, you’ve got nothing to lose so what is your excuse?” From another song by the same band, these words, “I pray to be inspired.”

This morning’s text from Exodus reveals the mystery of God, the nature and being of this God to whom we belong. Moses asks, “Who are you?” Or, “Who shall I say sent me?” God replies, “Tell Pharaoh that “I AM” sent you.” Or, perhaps a better translation of the Hebrew, “I AM WHO I WILL BE.” God, revealing God’s self as a Future Tense Verb. God, becoming in relation to and with our becoming. God, a living story woven together with our living stories. The glory of this mysterious unfolding far too great for us to behold or believe fully in any one moment. Revealed in glimpses, offered in invitations.

As I have sat with the living story of John Bul Dau, connected his story with my story, prayed about how I might respond in my life, how we might respond through the life of this community, I have wondered if a more appropriate question, more accurate one for me is less, “Has God grown tired of me?” and more, “Have I grown tired of God?” “Have we grown tired of God?” Have we forgotten to pray to be inspired?

Howard Ikemoto, an artist and art teacher who grew up in a Japanese internment camp in California during WWII shares this story: When my daughter was seven years old, she asked me one day what I did at work. I told her I worked at the college—that my job was to teach people how to draw. She stared back at me, incredulous, and said, “You mean they forgot?”
We forget. We learn to forget we are creative. We forget we are called to create beauty and peace and love in our lives and communities. We learn to forget we are beautiful, beloved, created and claimed by God. We forget others are beloved, too, created and claimed by God in all God’s mystery and glory. And, we forget to return to God what is God’s, our creativity, our love, our lives.

Each of us stands with Moses, needing to see God’s face, only to discover that God will remain a mystery. Each of us stands with Jesus, torn by this world, needing more time, more energy, more money, only to discover that God has already given us what we need to do the work God calls us to do. Tricky and complex to figure out how to rebalance, perhaps. Have we grown tired of God? I look out at you, you who are teaching children how to pray and how to love, you who are organizing collections for the women’s shelter, you who are birthing ideas for new growth in this community, you who are mowing my lawn and tending my flowers, you who coordinate roast beef dinners, you who visit the nursing homes, you who share music on Wednesdays and on Sundays, you who play BINGO at the Community Care Facility, you who donate your time and your money and yourselves to the work and witness of the living story of this community…When I see these parts of our living story, it is clear to me that you have not grown tired of God, and have not forgotten God. And God has not grown tired of us. How might we give to God what is God’s?

Thanks be to God. Amen.